Smooth Operator Page 13

  "God, no, you'll look nuttier than squirrel shit," Kat said firmly. "Listen. Do you like Tyler?"

  I hesitated. "Yes. A lot. Maybe more than like."

  "And that scares you."

  "Yes."

  "Why?"

  "Because I can't trust him," I blurted. "Maybe I can't trust any man after what I went through with Dave."

  Kat tutted sadly. "Don't say that. You're never going to learn to trust a man until you let them in, let them show you they're trustworthy."

  "Yeah, but if we do this and fail, it won't just be a secret heartache that I can nurse with some ice cream and wine and then move on. It'll be public knowledge, a million times worse than my last heartache because the whole world will know," I said.

  Kat sighed. "Ultimately, you're the only one who can choose this for you. You've got to do what's best for yourself. Just know that you're doing yourself a disservice here."

  "I'm helping myself in the long run. All I have to do is get through a few more weeks of shooting, and then I'll never have to see him again." Until then, I'd have to face Tyler every day, watch while he moves on to other women, and I wouldn't have any say in the matter because I'd broken it off with him without any explanation. "I've got to go. I'm hungover and need to sleep away all my problems."

  "Good luck with that," Kat said wryly. "I love you, you know. Even when you're an idiot."

  "Love you too, Kat." I tossed my phone to the side, snuggled up to my pillow, and fell asleep promptly.

  ∞∞∞

  I woke up mid-afternoon, ravenous and parched. For one brief moment, I forgot how awful I felt, what a horrible thing I had done, and I stretched out, ready to shower and get some food in my belly now that the nausea had passed.

  I rolled over groggily. My phone's screen was lit up from text messages and missed phone calls. Shit. The terrible feeling washed over me all over again. Three missed phone calls from Tyler, and texts that progressed from bewildered to pissed off.

  TS: Hey, where'd you disappear to?

  TS: Olivia? Are you coming back soon? I'm ready for breakfast.

  TS: Okay, are you fucking serious right now? Why aren't you answering any of my calls or texts?

  I considered calling him back but decided against it, not ready to deal with the anger and confrontation. Instead, I hopped in the shower. I caught a whiff of his musk on my shoulder, and a wave of sadness overtook me. I tried to wash Tyler off my body and my soul. No matter how hard I scrubbed, he was still there, as if he had clawed his way inside me, into all the crevices that couldn't be reached by the water. No matter how long I stood under the showerhead, letting the scorching water cascade over my body, I didn't feel any better.

  When the water started turning cold- who knew that was possible in hotels?- I turned the faucet off and got dressed, my stomach screaming at me now to feed it. I had a massive craving for some greasy food and a milkshake, and I couldn't get that from room service.

  I grabbed my keys and my phone, and at the last second, took the ball cap lying on my dresser and shoved it on my head. I kept my head down for the duration of the elevator ride, ready to dash through the lobby to the parking garage in the hopes of avoiding anyone I knew. No such luck.

  "Olivia!" Tyler called from the lobby lounge.

  There was no way I could pretend I hadn't heard him. He was standing there with Doug, making direct eye contact with me. He strode forward and grabbed me by the arm, pulling me into a corner. "Where the fuck have you been?" he hissed, looking around to make sure we weren't being watched.

  "Taking a nap and a shower." I shrugged my elbow out of Tyler's hand, trying to stay casual.

  "My room has both a bed and a shower, both of which are superior to yours," Tyler said. "Why would you not take advantage of that?"

  "Tyler," I started.

  "Don't do this," Tyler said, closing his eyes.

  "We may have gotten ahead of ourselves this morning," I finished. Dark, thunderous clouds formed in Tyler's eyes, but I forged ahead. "Maybe we should reel it back, keep this professional."

  "Goddammit, Olivia," he growled. "Were you being professional last night when you were begging me to fuck you? Or when you were sucking me off in a closet? How about this morning, when you were coming all over my dick?"

  I flushed. "No. And that's exactly why I need some space. We were getting too serious, too far in to pull back. So I'm pulling back."

  "So last night, I wanted to talk about us, and now you're done with me. Why are you so afraid of letting me in?" Tyler asked, taking my hand.

  "You know why. Because I can't trust you," I said. It was harsh, but it needed to be said.

  I watched my statement hit Tyler like I'd thrown a rock at him. He flinched and dropped my hand like it had burned him. "This again. That's fucking rich coming from someone who snuck out after getting her jollies with me. This tune is getting played out. All right, Olivia. You've got your wish. I give up. I'm leaving you alone now, so you can go hide in your fortress and protect your heart all you'd like. Just know that we could've been something great, and you're throwing it away because someone else did a number on you." Tyler looked at me in disgust. "See you on set."

  He strode back to a confused Doug, who was looking between the two of us in undisguised interest. "Nothing," Tyler answered loudly. "Something about the script."

  They left the lobby together without even a glance back towards me. I slumped against the wall, dismayed. I knew I'd done the right thing for myself, so why did I feel so rotten?

  Chapter Fifteen

  In the week since Tyler walked out on me in that hotel lobby, things had been tense. We only interacted on set when necessary, and even then, Tyler was all snarky comments and rude replies. I suspected he was performing his love scenes with more gusto than was strictly necessary to get a rise out of me. Doug was thrilled with the quality of his work, as was Vanessa, but I left every day with a sour taste in my mouth. Even though he was trying to make me angry, I decided to look at it positively. It was killer on film. Tyler sure was trying his damnedest to make me jealous as much as he possibly could whenever I was around. I knew it was a show for my attention, but I couldn't stop myself from imagining them in various intimate situations, his hands all over her, her hands all over him, both joking about how he'd once slummed it with the writer.

  The next Monday rolled around, and I got to set ready for another long week of snark and watching Tyler flirt with anything in a skirt. As soon as I walked in, I was accosted by Dayna, who was hurriedly running around trying to find some shirt Doug had lost.

  "Have you seen Doug's paisley button up?" she asked me exasperatedly.

  "No? Should I have?" I replied.

  She groaned and walked away.

  I watched as she desperately looked everywhere, eventually spotting it under the craft services table. Not stopping to ask anyone how Doug's shirt had gotten under a table, she crawled under the table to get it. Tyler was standing at the table pouring himself a cup of coffee, and when we locked eyes, his mouth hardened, and he turned his attention to Dayna. I pursed my lips as I watched him turn the charm up to eleven.

  "Hello, gorgeous," he said, flashing her the smile that had won him last year's Sexiest Man Alive. "Can I help you with that?"

  Dayna looked at him suspiciously. "How would you be able to help me? I already found the shirt. Do you have time to take it to the dry cleaners?"

  I played with my coffee cup, pretending to go over lines with a highlighter while observing their interaction from the corner of my eye. Tyler stole another glance at me and cleared his throat. "I'm great at dropping clothes off," he said, leaning against the table and into Dayna. "I'm even better at taking clothes off."

  Dayna's eyebrows rose about five inches. "Tyler, what are you up to?"

  "Just letting a pretty girl know about my...skills." Tyler winked at her during the short pause.

  "You're such a slut," Dayna said, laughing.

  "You love it," Tyler said
. "Care to get some firsthand experience about it?"

  "Tyler, I wouldn't touch you with a ten-foot-pole," Dayna said. "I can't afford the heartache- or the doctors' bills."

  Tyler placed a hand over his heart and staggered backward. "You wound me," he said dramatically. He winked at her again, and with one furtive glance at me, walked away to get his hair and makeup done for the first scene of the day.

  "Olivia?" Dayna approached me. "You okay? You're kind of stabby with the paper there."

  I glanced down at the nearly-shredded script pages that I would now have to print out and go over again. "I'm fine. Just relieving a little stress."

  "Really?" Dayna's face was dubious. "You ripped those script pages like you have a vendetta against them. I know they're corny, but come on." Dayna stopped chuckling when she saw my face. "Shit, sorry. I didn't mean to say your work is corny."

  "No, it's not that," I sighed. "Although, thanks for that, I love hearing feedback from fans of my work." I unclenched my fists. "Ugh. Can I vent to you?"

  "Anytime." Dayna placed the wrinkled shirt on the chair beside me and took a seat. "Tell me what's going on. What's got you so frustrated?"

  "Tyler," I confessed.

  "What about Tyler? Is he hamming it up too much as Rafe? I knew he should tone it back. It's too cheesy." Dayna nodded knowingly.

  "Man, you really don't think much of the movie. No, it's not that. Tyler is infuriatingly good at his job," I said. "I recently broke up with him, and now he's trying to drive me insane by flirting with every girl he comes into contact with when we're in the same vicinity. Or at least I think I broke up with him. Can you break up with someone you've never really been with?" I dropped my head onto my hands and groaned at Dayna's stunned face.

  "Dude. You and Tyler were seeing each other?" She exhaled. "I knew it! Or at least, I knew he was flirty with you." She nodded. "To be fair, he's flirty with everybody, that's just how he is." She was silent for a second, then let out a bark of laughter.

  "Why does everyone find this situation funny?" I asked, bewildered.

  "Sorry, it's just that you're probably the first person to ever break up with Tyler instead of the other way around," she explained. "No wonder he's not taking it well. He's resorting to heavy-duty flirting with other people in front of you because his pride is wounded."

  "That's helpful, thanks." I slumped in my chair, sulking.

  "Sorry, I didn't mean to bum you out further," Dayna said quickly. "Tell you what. Come to my house this weekend. We'll drink wine, commiserate over guys, play board games with my little sister, and bake some cookies that we'll immediately shove into our faces until we've eaten our way to happiness."

  I chuckled. "That sounds pretty amazing. I'd love to, but-"

  "No buts," Dayna said firmly. "You're coming because I won't stand for you moping around like this over a man. One that you broke up with, no less."

  I could not argue against that. "Yes, ma'am."

  "Good," Dayna said. "Now I have to go to the dry cleaner to wash the sex off a grown man's shirt." She stood up and grimaced.

  I wrinkled my nose. "Gross."

  "Yeah. I'm living the dream." She walked away, shirt in hand, leaving me to sit by myself and smooth out the pages of my script while I waited for Doug to get to set and start the day.

  Of course, to exacerbate my already awful mood, today's first scene was a love scene. Vanessa and Tyler had been on strict diets for the past couple of weeks, and the results spoke for themselves. Their spray-tanned hard bodies glimmered under the bright glow of the spotlights, and though I wanted to, I couldn't tear my eyes from them as they acted out the seminal love scene of the movie. I hated and loved how good they made it look.

  "My love, how long I've waited for you," Tyler's deep Rafe voice rumbled, English- accented and panty-dropping.

  "Monsieur, you shouldn't have come," Vanessa purred in her sexy French voice. How did she manage to make every syllable drip with sex?

  "How could I stay away?" Tyler untied the bindings at the front of his blouson, letting the linen shirt float to the ground. His golden chest, lightly sprinkled with golden brown hair, was hard and glistening under the heat of the lamps that were trained on the actors. I looked at it distractedly, at the chest that I'd had full access to for a short while. I was forlorn at the thought of never touching it again, never leaning my head against him and listening to his steady heartbeat as he held me in his arms after a vigorous lovemaking session.

  Vanessa broke my melancholic trance by gasping and turning her head in an exaggerated display of modesty that was at odds with her vampy appearance. Tyler reached for her, grabbing her chin and forcing her to look at his chiseled face. She succumbed to his seduction in a heap of lust that seemed far too realistic for my liking. I felt sick as they embraced passionately.

  Tyler undid her laces now, and the plain shift nightdress she was wearing dropped away to reveal a skin-colored body suit. Vanessa had been on board with a lot of stuff for the movie but had flat-out refused to go topless, claiming it was exploitative. I couldn't fault her for it- I wouldn't have gone nude either. So our compromise was flesh-colored body suits and a body double who was all too eager to be exploited.

  "Cut!" Doug yelled. "Stand-in, ready?"

  Vanessa's body double, Georgia, swapped places with her and stood in front of Tyler with a shy smile. Tyler winked at her encouragingly. He had no issue going nude and had not opted for a body double, choosing instead to show off the body that he'd worked so hard for. He looked over to where I was sitting and caught me staring. I looked away quickly, but not before I saw his smug smile.

  Vanessa pulled on the robe someone was holding out for her and waved Dayna over. "Get me some mineral water, please. I need to hydrate."

  She dismissed Dayna summarily and sat next to me while Tyler and Georgia continued the scene. She took a swig from the water bottle Dayna had grudgingly dropped off and looked over at me. "How did we look?"

  "Very believable as a wilting flower," I whispered. I declined to mention the hot ball of jealousy eating away at me in the pit of my stomach as I doubted very much that she would care.

  She nodded. "Thanks."

  Doug called for everyone to be quiet, and we hushed while we waited for Tyler and Georgia to finish their scene. I diligently checked and double-checked my notes on the page for the duration of filming, not wanting to watch Tyler's hands skim all over someone else's body, even if it were just for show.

  Georgia and Tyler finished their scene quickly, to my relief, and Doug called for an hour-long lunch break for cast and crew. I'd brought my lunch today and planned on finding a quiet place to sit and work on my new manuscript. I hopped off my chair as soon as Doug called "cut" and went off in search of a private bench, which I found outside the soundstage in the sunny early summer day. I sat on my bench, working quietly, and didn't look up at the sound of someone clearing their throat loudly. That someone nudged my foot with their own, and I finally looked up. It was Tyler, somewhat regrettably fully dressed again. He held his lunch at his side as he loomed over me. "Can I sit?"

  I cleared a spot on the bench next to me, carefully training my face so as not to show my surprise. "It's a free country."

  Tyler sat down and opened his lunch box. "Blech. I hate these pre-arranged meals that my nutritionist makes for me." He bit into a protein ball and chewed, the ensuing silence engulfing us in its awkwardness. I continued to write silently, eating my sandwich. The only indication that I was aware of Tyler was the raised goosebumps on my skin.

  "Can we call a ceasefire?" Tyler asked, surprising me.

  I looked up from my manuscript. "I don't know what you mean."

  "Come on," he scoffed. "The hell you don't."

  I shrugged. Denial was one of my fortes. "Whatever you say."

  "I want us to be friends again, even if you don't want to be with me. It's hard being this mean to you," Tyler said.

  I squirmed, uncomfortable with his bald honestl
y. "Tyler."

  "Olivia," he said in a mock serious voice.

  I sighed and put my notebook down. His face was so sincere that my heart broke all over again. I couldn't say no. "Okay. Let's be friends again."

  Tyler's face broke into a broad smile. "Excellent. And if it happens to progress past that-"

  "It won't," I interrupted.

  "Kidding!" He held up his hands defensively and took another bite of protein ball.

  "Besides, I saw the way you were with Vanessa. Maybe it'll work out the way it's supposed to," I said offhandedly, picking my notebook back up.

  "Oh, this again?" Tyler stared at me with a hard gaze.

  "Come on. Even if we'd gotten together, you'd still be into her, right?" I said weakly. "I mean, look at the chemistry between you two."

  "I'm glad you have such a high opinion of me," Tyler bit out. "It's called acting. It's my job to have chemistry with someone if we're playing lovers. You know what, I don't think I'm ready to be friends with you right now." He got up and walked away abruptly, leaving his lunch on the bench next to me.

  "Tyler, come on, it was a joke," I called. He didn't look back.

  So much for a ceasefire.

  ∞∞∞

  We made it through the rest of the day without talking, though I did catch the fire of an angry glare from Tyler here and there. I felt terrible about what I'd said, and I'd regretted it immediately, but once it was out there in the open, there was no taking it back.

  I guess I had it coming when Tyler started flirting, hard, with Vanessa between takes, harder than he had ever done. So what if he was only doing it to get a rise out of me, to make my blood boil? It hurt just the same and reinforced all the reasons I'd decided to guard my heart against Tyler in the first place. Those two flirted nonstop throughout the next two scenes, so much so that even Doug told them to tone it down.

  I shouldn't have been surprised when, giggling, Vanessa planted a fat one on Tyler, then ran away, claiming it was a joke. Tyler looked at me, stricken, but rearranged his face to look smug when he realized I had seen the whole thing. I bit my lip and kept my head down, not wanting him to see my burning cheeks.